An Excerpt from The Millennial Christian Devotional
“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19–20).
The Sex Problem
An idea that has been widely accepted today is that sex sells. A substantial amount of people seem to be complacent with the idea that their body counts don’t matter. Some even feel that it’s a major accomplishment to not be a virgin before marriage. Promiscuity is promoted. It is bragged about in songs, movies, and on television series. We see sex everywhere. And not that I am exempt. I have had my dealings with the premarital sex sin myself. However, I am continuing to rely on the Holy Spirit to keep me, because I realize the impossibility of resisting sex without the help of someone more powerful than my fleshly desires.
So, in a society that overtly pushes the consumption of sexual content, how do we promote abstinence and celibacy? How do we do this without seeming stringent, rigid, legalistic, and hypercritical? How do we compete with the overarching message that sex outside of marriage is acceptable? Can we ask people to give up something they like for someone greater to love? How do we perpetuate the message that being a virgin is still attractive or that abstinence is favorable? How do we convey the message that sex outside of marriage is not God’s plan or design?
Let’s Start at the Beginning
When we look at Genesis, we see the exact origin of sex. God gave Adam and Eve the command to be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth. He gave them a command to do what was appropriate for the increase of humankind and for the filling of the earth with inhabitants. We see this in Isaiah 45:18. This shows that marriage is an ordinance of God that was instituted in the Garden. It also shows that procreation is natural and may be performed without sin.
We see, on numerous occasions in Scripture, how and where sex is to be practiced. In 1 Corinthians, Galatians, and 1 Thessalonians, fornication, or premarital sex, is not condoned by God and for good cause. Today, an increasing worldview suggests that Christians are a part of a very tyrannical, anarchical type of faith. This is not true. However, Christianity is also not a democracy because believers have already been given the guide for holy living.
If you think about what it saves us from, you’ll see why the Bible tells us to stay away from certain things. Frivolous, incautious sex can come with unwanted results—pregnancy, diseases, soul ties, stalkers, heartbreak, and a lot of other implications that we don’t necessarily desire, if we’re honest. And that goes for so many other sins or things that keep us from living peaceful, joyful, holy lives. This is why it’s important to appreciate what someone who loves you will warn you against to potentially save your life.
True Satisfaction?
I’m not sure how familiar you are with the Paradox of Hedonism, but it points out that the more we seek out pleasure, the less we enjoy it because it may not yield the results we seek. Our lack of discipline and self-control is what can put us in situations that fuel the wrong sexual desires. One wrong decision, one wrong person, one too many lustful conversations can have us living with lingering consequences. Consequences that resulted from only a moment of pseudo-satisfaction that’s void of true fulfillment.
The Bible urges us to “flee from sexual immorality,” because “every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body” (1 Corinthians 6:18). Our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit within us, so they don’t belong to us. In protecting, preserving, respecting, and honoring these temples, we must watch what we do with them and with whom we do it.
Is God Better than Sex?
In knowing the consequences of unwise sexual decisions and defining where sex should exist and how sex within this existence pleases God, it can be concluded that sex is only as good as the God who created it. Because we know God to be greater than anything that exists (because He is God, and He is the Creator), He must be better than sex. Thinking on a spiritual level tells us that if the God who created sex is better than sex and sex is designed for marriage, if we are unmarried and engage in sex outside of marriage, we are fundamentally saying to God, “the sex You created for me to enjoy in marriage is better than You?”
We must recognize that by giving in to deviant sexual desires, we are also telling God, “God, my desire to feel good right now is more important than my desire to please You.” Albeit indirect, this is not the message we should want to send to the God we say we love. What we grow daily to do is learn more of Him and discipline ourselves so that when we have those desires, we have the strength to say no. This strength comes through God’s Word. And the embracing of this strength comes through becoming more intimate with Him.
Overcoming Sexual Temptation
Holy living should be an action governed by the goal to gain eternal life (Romans 8:18; John 3:16; Philippians 1:21). Just think, everything we experience here that we enjoy, the right way, won’t come close to what we will experience with God. Although when we mention sex, it automatically connotes negativity, sex, when done right, is an act of joining together in oneness with the person God gave you. In acknowledging this, don’t you just think that since God gave sex in marriage, the sex inside that God-ordained, God-designed marriage will be better than all those meaningless connections that you may or may not remember?
Our flesh is a sick thing, and it always leaves us searching for more. Sin leaves us searching for more, because it’s not fulfilling. By saving ourselves for the spouse God has ordained for us, we can save ourselves from committing an act of sin, from feelings of shame, disappointment, regret, and from feeling misused. We can also save ourselves from the unknown. Because let’s face it, unless the Holy Spirit reveals someone to us, we don’t really know a person. And by giving our bodies to someone that we don’t truly know, we take a chance with our health and our heart, neither of which should be taken lightly.
The Flesh and the Spirit
Remember, the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit (Galatians 5:17), and although our flesh is strong, the Holy Spirit is stronger. We also must realize that a good way to overcome the desire to partake in sinful sexual acts is to not intentionally open avenues for that desire to overtake us. If this were easy, everyone would get it right, but the truth is, it’s not. Since God knows just how powerful our flesh is, He gives us His Word and Himself, who is all powerful. We just have to let this power work within us (Ephesians 3:20) so that we will always be spiritually prepared for attacks that may come our way. That’s even if those attacks come from our own flesh.
Save Yourself to Save Yourself
I know a lot of people who wish they would’ve done things differently, me being one of them. But I also know a lot of people who are thankful that God spared them throughout the years of their careless and negligent behavior. No matter what culture says, there is nothing wrong with saving yourself for marriage. If you haven’t, there is still time to start over. Don’t fall victim to your flesh; plenty of us already have. And if you were to poll others who had it to do all over again, I’m sure they would tell you that by only giving your body to the one God has prepared for you, you are saving yourself to save yourself.
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