Recently, I was at a pool party with several non-Catholic friends. I was having a lot of fun, but needed to leave early to go to Confession. As I left, everyone asked me “where are you going?” And I answered, to meet my sister.
Even though these are people I trust and love, the lie slipped out immediately. As I walked to my car, I couldn’t believe myself. After years of working on courage in witnessing my faith, I had failed again.
I can’t even begin to count the number of times I have lied about my faith. Whether I’m heading to Mass, Confession, or Bible study, a lie is always at the ready: I have homework. My mom’s expecting me home. I’m meeting a friend…
The funny thing is I have never met a negative reaction to my Catholic faith. The times when I have taken courage and admitted that I was going to Mass or explained what my miraculous medal, my non-Catholic/Christian friends have been open and accepting. In fact, many of them have been curious or outright drawn to my faith.
These small acts of witness can be powerful. When I was younger, I would often daydream of preaching from a mountaintop and reaching thousands of hearts, of the Holy Spirit touching their lives through my words (for more on desires, read this post). But in a way, aren’t the daily small witnesses more powerful? And doesn’t it require more courage to be vulnerable with those closest to us than strangers?
Perhaps when Jesus instructed us to love our neighbors, he literally meant our neighbors! Imagine if everyone took the time to love those around them—the annoying family member, the elderly neighbor, the teacher that yelled at them once. Wouldn’t that create a more beautiful, vibrant world? After all, the people in my life have inspired and challenged me much more than any celebrity.
Let’s take a look at some practical steps we can take to witness your faith to your neighbors in your daily life.
1. Be Transparent about Your Faith in Everday Life
My senior year of high school, I attended an overnight prospective-undergraduate tour of a university. I slept over at the dorm of a current sophomore who would be my guide for the weekend. Having attended Catholic school my entire life, I was a little worried of what life outside a Catholic bubble might be like. Even then, I was aware of my timidity in witnessing my faith.
My host was the opposite of timid. The first thing she told me when we met for the first time was, “sorry I’m late, I was at my church choir practice!”
Church choir practice, she said. She didn’t omit her faith from her words. Throughout the entire weekend, I was continually astounded by her bold, self-assured witness of her faith. It wasn’t an obnoxious tendency to preach at every opportunity. Rather, her faith was so woven into her daily life that it was impossible not to discuss it.
Though we only knew each other for two days, her example has continued to inspire me. And I pray that one day I will have that same boldness and courage. (By the way, for all my fellow Catholics out there who might be a little prejudiced, I just want to point out this girl is Protestant and overflowing with love for the Lord). Being transparent about our lives is a powerful witness of faith.
2. Nurture Virtue
A relationship with God is not something you can fake. It’s also something you can’t hide. It witnesses your faith without you having to lift a finger. A relationship with God is the most real thing in human life. It’s what we were made for. If you have a true relationship with God, it will spill out of you. The joy will overflow and others will notice.
As St. Francis of Assissi said, “Preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary use words.”
Many people have impacted me without ever using words. But the most impactful one was a woman I never spoke to. I had been training capoeira for a year. I was in class, practicing my kicks when this woman walks in. She was one of my teacher’s students who had recently moved back to San Antonio. Something about her drew my entire attention. It was more than charisma. It was that she was fully alive and I could feel it.
It’s one of those things that makes such little sense that I half think I imagined it. I only saw her a couple times afterwards, but each time my experience was the same. I don’t even know for sure what her relationship with God was. But one thing is for sure: the impact of her presence was powerful and irrevocable. I was not only inspired, but moved to action to live to my full potential. I don’t know of any other way this presence could have been achieved aside from God.
If the Holy Spirit is in us, people will notice. Sometimes our presence is all it takes to witness our faith! Though when necessary, we should use our words (aka when one leaves a pool party to go to Confession…). And though we might never know it, just as this woman didn’t see her impact on my life, God will work through us.
3. Listen with Compassion
It seems to be a thing of human nature that we’d rather be listened to than listen. The moment someone brings up a moral issue, my mind is immediately running through all the Bible-backed and anecdotal refutations. But do I really expect the other person to listen to my arguments when I haven’t listened to theirs?
Even worse is when the other person is sharing an experience not debating and instead of listening, we are compiling an argument for what they should have done, what would have been more morally acceptable. Sometimes, it’s okay not to speak up. Sometimes, God is only calling us to listen with compassion. Listening is a powerful form of love and, thus, a powerful witness to your faith.
Let’s go back to the pool party. While talking about school anecdotes, someone brought up a story from her elementary school. An eleven year old girl was raped and became pregnant. Her family took her to get an abortion and everyone expressed great relief that she wasn’t part of those “god-fearing families that force kids to have babies.”
My initial instinct was to rise to the defense of my faith. An abortion is just added trauma. An unborn baby is still a baby. But I bit my tongue. What good would it have done? These people already knew I was Catholic. They already knew my thoughts on abortion. And my voicing it would not have changed their minds. It would have been perceived as an insensitive prioritization of principles over the person. Instead, I listened.
It is through listening like this that I am completely convicted that the everyday pro-choice (and other moral issues) person is not evil. In this conversation, no one was saying “killing babies is a good thing.” They were expressing deep sorrow at an evil committed against a young girl. They were expressing relief at what they perceived to be a mercy towards the girl. There’s always exceptions of course, but most people have their hearts in the right place. Watching Mama Dr. Jones’ discussions on abortions on Youtube helped me understand even more how grounded in compassion her pro-choice stance is.
There’s a time and place for logical debates about truth. But more often than not, there’s an invitation from God to listen with compassion. Listening doesn’t mean losing your principles, it means growing in empathy.
Key Takeaway
Witnessing your faith in a compassionate, non-prideful way is a lifelong process of refinement. It balances on the edge of a blade. Even now, I wonder, should I have spoken up about the abortion story? Or was I right to listen quietly? People can argue either way. But I trust that the Holy Spirit can work with all my uncertainties and lack of courage. I hope one day, I’ll be able to witness my faith in whatever way the Holy Spirit asks me to. Whether that means admitting I’m going to Confession or otherwise.
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Check out my series on discernment here!
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