Alternative Ash Wednesday Liturgy

Remember: Say the Black. Do the Red

For this liturgy the celebrator shall wear a black overall with a day glo work vest to identify with the working people of God. On his head he shall wear a black hard hat with purple trim. (A purple pompom may be added by Monsignore)

The celebrator shall assemble the processional people at the back of the ecclesial structure (or at a community waste disposal site if possible). Each processional person shall carry an appropriate desert symbol: a handful of dust, a rock, a bucket of sand, a cactus, a Bedouin tent. Instead of a cross the processional leader person shall carry an icon of a persecuted person. (Harvey Milk or Jane Fonda for example)

The serving person shall hold the reins of the camel while the celebrator ascends. He or she holds a bucket of holy water in one hand and a bucket of dirt in the other symbolizing the melting ice caps and the desert the world will soon become.

Celebrator: (with buckets upstretched) Good morning! (or afternoon or evening as appropriate) How’re y’all doin’? (for it is the South Carolina liturgy)

The procession proceeds with the processional people of every age, race, nation, ethnic language group, sexual diversity persons and those who have an overdue book at the library and are feeling bad. The camel and celebrator riding on it come last.

At the entrance to the community waste disposal land fill location (or the appropriate ecclesical structure) the procession stops.

Celebrator: This procession has now stopped. Whoa there Humpy! The Force Be With You.

People: And also with you and your camel.

The celebrator dismounts.

Celebrator: Together we have gathered, and we shall now sing the gathering song.

This song shall be sung: We have gathered out of the garden into the desert of God, walking where all the sorrowful people have trod, But we know that God always holds our hand, for we are going to the promised land. The sun is on our back, the light is in our eyes. We are happy to know that we are God’s good girls and guys. etc.

Celebrator: Now you all know that you have sometimes done things that make you feel bad. This is not a nice feeling. We do not want you to feel bad. We want you to feel good. More often people have done things to you that make you feel bad. These are bad people. It is their fault. At this time we will all hug one another and look each other in the eye and say, “I like you!”

The people all do so.

Celebrator: We also know that sometimes we have done things that make global warming increase. Because we did not want to increase our carbon footprint we did not burn palms this year to make ashes. Instead we will use dirt. You may come forward now to have holy dirt put on your head.

The people process forward holding their desert symbol object. Someone should hold the camel (especially if a child walks behind the camel holding a cactus) They receive a smudge of dirt on the forehead instead of a cross. This is the Hindu tilak which represents the third eye.

Celebrator: (as he smudges each person) This represents the third eye. May you see more clearly.

After the smudging of dirt all people return to their places to pray for world peace and all waste disposal workers. The liturgy then continues as normal. (But someone should take the camel out)