“What man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!” (Matthew 7:9–11).
Hit-and-Miss Gifting
Have you ever received a nicely-wrapped present, only to discover that instead of your latest and greatest fascination, inside was a “White Elephant” gift? Despite its name, it’s not an actual four-legged safari animal, but a phrase coined for a misdirected gift that leaves you thinking, “You really shouldn’t have.”
Playing off this idea, some groups do a “White Elephant” gift exchange during the holidays, bringing their own hardly-used gifts. I think back to playing the game with my fellow Christian bookstore workers and our manager offering up a large bottle of poisonous cologne (I won’t offer the name lest I offend a reader who actually wears it). When the manager retired, guess what he received as a parting gift?
Not all gifts are welcomed with the same enthusiasm. Don’t get me wrong; I believe gift-giving is one of the kindest actions a person can do. However, not everyone is good at selecting the right gift for the right person. The back of your closet or storage room can probably bear witness to this. The possibility of giving an unwanted gift is one reason the popularity of the gift card and gift certificate concept has grown so much in recent years. Some gift-givers realize their inability to give a gift that has the “wow” factor.
Why is it so hard for some people to wow their recipient with a good gift? Here are a few reasons:
Personal knowledge—Some people simply don’t know the person they are buying for well enough. This is particularly true when names are drawn in a large family or church. Once a name is drawn, pretty soon the questions begin to swirl around about the person’s hobbies or wants. You may even see some people visibly excited when they realize their name was selected by a person who knows them the best.
Without intimate knowledge of your subject, you’re most likely to gift them something they don’t need or want, or may already have. When I was a teenager, on a day before Christmas, my brother asked me about a certain musical artist. “He’s okay, but I probably wouldn’t buy any of his music,” was my response. I opened his present on Christmas to discover the latest tape from the “okay” singer. The moment of discovery was one of my first Academy Award-worthy performances, as I smiled and feigned excitement.
Great expectations—We live in a materialistically-minded culture. Through media, we are made aware of wealthy people who pore through stacks of money in celebration and excess. In appealing to the deep pockets, advertisers catch middle and lower-income people in the crosshairs, creating a fascination and perhaps even a false reality sometimes attained through overextended budgets. Our quest for bigger and better gifts eventually leads to disappointed recipients.
Limited resources—It’s not that people don’t want to give the best gifts, but funds are limited. How many times have you heard someone say, “I wish I could have given you more”? On top of great expectations, our resources are sometimes stretched trying to give someone a really good “wow” moment.
Because I’ve had gift-givers who knew me, who exceeded my expectations, and had the resources at the right time, I have had plenty of “wow” moments in my life. I’ll never forget walking into my living room and seeing what appeared to be the entire Star Wars section of our local toy store. One year, I had surveyed all the size of the gifts and resigned myself that I wasn’t getting the Atari video game system, only to happily discover it was smaller than I remembered. More recently, my wife surprised me with my own chair (that she carried in by herself )for our living room.
The Perfect Gift-Giver
As much as I have been astonished with so many wonderful presents given by family, friends, and sometimes even strangers, I have to tell you that the greatest gifts I’ve ever received in my life come from the perfect gift-giver who gave us the good and perfect gift of grace; “And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14).
It is that amazing grace, the ultimate gift, that unites us as believers, that has transformed our lives. We were extended grace when we deserved none. Through it, God fulfills the criteria for being not only a good gift-giver, but the perfect gift-giver.
First of all, He knows us. He’s not late to the party. He doesn’t have to pull up our online profile to remember where we work or who our friends are. The Word says even the hairs of our head are numbered. He saw our struggles and knew what we needed most of all was Jesus.
“If our greatest need had been information, God would have sent us an educator.
If our greatest need had been technology, God would have sent us a scientist.
If our greatest need had been money, God would have sent us an economist.
If our greatest need had been pleasure, God would have sent us an entertainer.
But our greatest need was forgiveness, so God sent us a Savior.”
—Unfinished Business, Charles Sell, Multnomah, 1989
Secondly, He surpasses all of our expectations. We sometimes view God on human terms, because we base our understanding on people we have met and things we can see. We consider the fact that, most of the time, our gifts correspond to what we have offered. If we show up to a celebration without a gift or fail to present a gift to a friend, we don’t expect one in return and are sometimes embarrassed to get one. Grace is free. That doesn’t mean it’s cheap or meaningless. It is transformational.
Finally, His resources are limitless. God is not a long-lost relative who suddenly came into good money and blesses you with some of the spillover. He’s not a friend who offers for you to order anything off the menu, but secretly hopes you’ll pick a hamburger. God is the creator and owner of the universe. Everyone who has ever been born has spent every moment of their lives living on His property. Everything is His, including everything you own. Every good gift you’ve ever received—spiritual, physical, relational—came from Him.
Have you ever given brought a present to someone that you thought was the best, but before it’s unwrapped, someone offers a gift that blows everything else away? You whisper to another friend, “Wasn’t there a price limit?”
That’s my Father. He’s the giver of all good and perfect gifts. And He knows how to “wow.”
“But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast. “(Ephesians 2:4–9).
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