Catholic Jokes: Good, and Good for You

This evening, in honor of Fr. Jim Martin’s new book, Between Heaven and Mirth, my editor, Elizabeth Scalia, has put out an APB for Catholic jokes. Well, as it happens, I have a few to share. The first one I heard from the Dominican priest who baptized me. It goes like this:

What’s the difference between the Order of Preachers and the Society of Jesus?

One was founded in the 13th century to fight the Albigensian heresy; the second, in the 16th century to fight the Protestant heresies.

What’s the other difference?

You seen any Albigensians running around lately?

These two I made up my own self. (One I’m recycling, but hey, that’s stewardship, right?)

How many sedevacantists does it take to change a light bulb?

Stupid question. None of them can stand to change anything.

Did you hear about the conservative bishop? (How conservative was he?)

He was so conservative, he condemned the Hypostatic Union for not operating on a right-to-work basis.

Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week.