Everyone says they want a happier, healthier, more loving relationship with their spouse, and who could blame them? That idea of happily ever after sounds pretty good, right? Here’s the thing however – too often it’s not always our partner that creates the rifts that allow us to drift apart. Many times? We’re the ones getting in the way. Here are seven things to quit right now if you want to create and sustain a healthy, happy marriage. Quit Thinking... Read more
An affair is the violation of the marriage contract that occurs when the spouse is replaced by someone or something else. It is one of the worst things that can happen to a marriage because it violates everything you’ve built with a partner in such a personal way. We are often blindsided by these relationships because we didn’t see it coming. You might not have physically cheated on your spouse, but have you had an affair in a different way?... Read more
Manipulation is insidious. It makes you doubt your own perceptions and can keep you from even realizing that you are being manipulated. If you do manage to figure out that something is not quite adding up, that does not mean you can automatically shake off all manipulation. Manipulators are excellent at playing on your strongest emotions, and emotional reactions tend to bypass your better sense. A master manipulator could essentially tell you to your face that he is going to... Read more
A fight between two people (lovers, spouses, family members) is a kind of psychological battle often filled with personal attacks, accusations, and dredging up past mistakes. When both parties are exhausted, or one grudgingly concedes, the fight ends – for the moment. But nothing has changed; resentment has just gone underground until it’s dug up again, and hostilities soon resume. But it needn’t be this way. There’s a little known “magic” that can stop any fight in the moment, and... Read more
The highly popular and recently concluded television series Longmire featured a dedicated and unflappable sheriff bent on maintaining law and order in the rugged terrain of Wyoming without the use of a technological staple – the cell phone. Walt Longmire represented that part of every generation who desperately holds on to the good old days while inevitably finding themselves being dragged kicking and screaming into the technological advances of the next. Maybe you as a parent or grandparent can relate... Read more
Most of us have heard of an area in a hospital called the “ICU.” These three letters are an “acronym” that is an abbreviation for “Intensive Care Unit.” The ICU is a designated floor in a hospital where, due to a severe injury or sudden onset of a life-threatening health issue, one is taken to receive round-the-clock attention. Even if we’ve never been in such a place, surely we know someone who has. Now, keeping this same idea in mind,... Read more
Here’s a situation many of us may be familiar with. We’re spending a relaxing evening at home, or maybe we’re taking a nice walk with the one we love. As far as we know, everything is just fine. And then all at once, with no warning at all, our partner says something that makes us feel like they just tossed a bomb at us. Now that it’s too late, it’s obvious: we didn’t see any of the familiar signs that... Read more
Just before a moment with another person starts “going south,” there’s a part of us that realizes something is about to go terribly wrong. Our usual response is to blame the other person for “ruining our day.” But, for those of us who seek the ability to weather this storm, and all those to come, there’s something different we can do that not only keeps our day from being ruined, but that elevates both ourselves and the other person –... Read more
Our relationships with one another are often a source of distress. One major form of conflict we experience with others involves their failure to give us the consideration we feel they owe us. We often suffer from thoughts like these: “She is not being respectful enough.” “He is not as kind as I want him to be.” “They just don’t care as deeply as I do.” However, if we will be courageous enough to see the truth of the next... Read more
Your wedding vows are a commitment you make to your spouse before your families, friends, and God to stick together through thick and thin. By following these vows you’ll be ensuring a successful marriage in the future. The origin of the traditional wedding vows as we know them today stretches back to the days of the (many times married) King Henry VIII of England. The Archbishop of Canterbury at the time, Thomas Cranmer, is often credited with creating the standard... Read more
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